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Re: as above, breaking my heart » crushedout

Posted by mayzee on July 23, 2006, at 20:22:36

In reply to Re: as above, breaking my heart » mayzee, posted by crushedout on July 22, 2006, at 16:28:39

>
> I totally understand your frustration and often feel exactly the same way. But I also suspect it's not about your T. I mean, even though it's possible that if you got a really unattractive T, this wouldn't come up, it still is not entirely about the therapist.
>
> And your P.S. makes me think especially that this may be something important you need to deal with. Although what "dealing with it" means, I have yet to really figure out myself, as you can tell from my posts above.
>

Thanks for your reply crushed. It has me thinking about what it is I can learn from this. It's weird, because it doesn't feel like love to me so much as *infatuation*. I've only known him a few months but felt this big crush after just 1 or 2 sessions. Mainly I just want to get rid of that feeling and get down to work with him on my other issues.

So there's the aspect of not wanting to have the feeling if I can't act on it. Being very frustrated by that; and out of control. There's definitely my thoughts that "if only I were good enough, then he'd love me back." And the "I'm too needy" stuff. I'm also thinking there might be some work around why I have a huge crush on someone I don't even know (he doesn't tell me anything about his private life). Especially because the last guy I dated, years ago, I had a similar "this makes no sense but I'm obsessed" crush on. So I guess all of those things are things to work on. It's just so distracting sometimes!!!


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