Posted by Lonely on July 19, 2006, at 0:38:20
This afternoon my husband and I saw his MS neurologist for a follow-up visit at a major medical center. We requested a meeting with the clinic social worker as part of making a plan for his probable disability sooner or later. A neuropsychologist had advised this earlier in the year as had a primary care physician a few years ago.
She was the you-know-what social worker from-you-know-where. She never even looked at my husband's file but immediately launched into a lecture rather berating us as though we were looking for a free hand-out - we weren't. She was more mouth than ears. I immediately disliked her and she said something to the effect that she could detect my anger. I sure was and still am. I'm distressed at being misused by the very person who is supposed to be helping.
She asked me what my commitment was and had I/we worked on the marriage after I explained (in somewhat emotional terms as I am very upset) my husband's very serious and near-deadly history of behavior. I really expected more sensitivity and gentle questioning - not the insensitive steam roller who shot off her mouth w/o exploring the real issues.
She never gave us any real solid information except to say that a nursing home stay would take most any funds we have (including what I might earn) when my husband needs nursing home care. I know there must be trusts that can be set up and at the end she admitted to it but sure didn't give any suggestions, referrals, agencies or anything else. This was just one mean insensitive you-know-what !!!!!
I guess my question is - where can I complain? Where can I get more comprehensive information? Where can I get a trust or whatever drawn up to protect me? Money is an issue - I would have to mortgage the house to get $4,000 to pay a good attorney - at least that's my impression from someone I talked to in a support group.
This is a very complex situation. Ironically, though, for once, one doctor there seemed to understand better than anyone else - and usually MD's are at the bottom of my list! I'm scared and feel completely unsupported in this - as I've felt for many years. I go to a social worker T myself and I'll talk to her about this but not so sure she has the answers even thought today's social worker implied that she should. These sojourns (forays?)into what I now consider the enemy camp are definitely not theraputic.
poster:Lonely
thread:668190
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060703/msgs/668190.html