Posted by wishingstar on March 14, 2006, at 21:41:21
I saw my T today. I really have a knack for bringing up the most important issues when we only have 5 minutes or so left.. and thats what I did today. Usually it just doesnt get talked about, but today the session ended up going 20 minutes over. Oops.
I told her that although I think part of the reason I dont feel heard may be transference, I still really dont feel heard and I think it's a real problem. I told her that I think she thinks I'm exagerrating and doesnt realize how serious I am when I say I feel bad. I also said that it bothers me when I say I'm suicidal and she never brings it up or asks about it again.. its really devalidating (if thats a word). She still seems hesitant to push any harder for feelings (she said she doesnt think its her job to pull it out of me, and I guess I agree).. but she did understand what I said and promised to try and be more validating and let me know shes hearing me. I hope it's true this time.
I brought her the book "I Had a Black Dog" today. It's a picture book with a few words (written like a kids book) talking about the effect depression has on your life. The illustrations are really great. She proceeded to hold it up like you would with a little kid (so we could both see the pictures) and read it aloud. I laughed the entire time.. I havent had a book read to me since I was 5! She even changed her voice some at angry, sad, etc parts.. I can really tell she has young children! :)
poster:wishingstar
thread:620388
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060312/msgs/620388.html