Posted by madeline on March 9, 2006, at 22:04:55
So, tonight I was doing this positive visualization exercise where I picture myself doing and feeling things that would normally scare me to death in real life.
I was visualizing a very positive interaction that I had just had with my T and reliving the suffusion of really positive feelings that came out of it.
And I started thinking about all of the fear I felt as child in the house I grew up in. I mean it was like a stuttering, overwhelming kind of fear. Even though I didn't want to, I began to see myself (as a child) back in that house.
This overwhelming desire came over me to want to (as an adult) get back into that house and save that poor little girl there, just snatch her up and get her out of all that pain and run away.
That desire is still very strong even as I write this.
But instead of actually getting into the house, there are bars or something on the windows and doors. I can see her (me) in there, but I can't get to her.
I had to snap out of the exercise. It just became too much to take.
I've been progressing a lot in therapy, and this feels like a real backslide to me.
Does anyone have any idea what this could mean?
Maddie
poster:madeline
thread:618141
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060225/msgs/618141.html