Posted by Susan47 on January 13, 2006, at 0:46:55
In reply to Re: Made my last call....I've STOPPED CALLING » Susan47, posted by one woman cine on January 12, 2006, at 13:50:38
The type of call where I say something. Usually my calls are me listening to the voice on the other end, which is the answering machine, which isn't even his voice, hasn't been for a long time now ... and I listen, and I breathe, and I remember there was once a connection, something that was wonderful and alive for me, and I'm really not dead, not right now, not at this moment ... my obsession was such that he was a He, and He was Everything to me, and He became an answering machine when he transcended some space in my head, a look that shouldn't have been and maybe even according to him, wasn't ... so my last call was meant to be the last call. Really. It was the next day the next morning, even, that I made three more calls ... I think .. my memory isn't very clear about anything right now ... it was the next day, and they were listening calls only, not the kind of a call where I say anything, to be heard. To be heard is not to be. Not properly. I understand that this person or these people will never properly understand, I'm the only one who hears me. Is it like that for everyone?
poster:Susan47
thread:592087
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060110/msgs/598571.html