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Re: What if I mislead? » orchid

Posted by Tamar on October 19, 2005, at 19:35:17

In reply to What if I mislead? » Tamar, posted by orchid on October 19, 2005, at 17:43:40

Hi Orchid,

> The thing I am most worried about is - what if I mislead a kid? What if I make the kid like me and make the kid to grow up in a wrong way? I am not a happy person, so I am very concerned about imparting wrong influence on a kid. Atleast adults will be able to make out the good or the bad from what I say.
>
> I shouldn't harm in the name of doing good right?

Well, I find it hard to imagine that a kid could grow up in the wrong way just from liking you! It’s true you could have a great deal of influence over kids, but I really think that if you get some experience of working with kids you will find the skills you need to help them grow up in the right way!

And I also think you are an inherently good person, so any attention and love you give to a kid would be a good thing, right?

Of course, everyone makes mistakes. Parents make mistakes; teachers make mistakes; care workers make mistakes. But it’s not the end of the world… and children do need to learn that the world isn’t perfect. I guess it’s a question of degree.

I wonder if your concerns about this are coloured by your own childhood, in which your father made mistakes that were not simply mistakes but actually constituted abuse. If you’re worried about the long term effects of mistakes, I would say that most mistakes that people make are not deeply traumatic for children, unless they’re repeated over and over (or unless they actually constitute abuse).

I really think that you have a lot to offer and that if you decide to work with kids you’ll bring a lot of happiness to their lives.

Tamar


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