Posted by cricket on August 25, 2005, at 11:49:44
So for three years now, I have assumed that my therapist, even if very competent, is rather indifferent to me. He treats me because that is his job. He would be happy if I disappeared. He completely forgets I exist from week to week.
For three years, I’ve been looking for evidence that above assumptions are correct. And despite, my being willing to interpret almost anything in favor of my assumption, I really haven’t found any solid evidence that the above assumption is true.
So what if I just assumed something different?
What if I assume that he cares about me? He treats me, despite the fact that he could readily get easier, better-paying patients, because he likes me and likes the challenge I present? He doesn’t forget my existence until he sees my face on Tuesday afternoon, but I pass through his mind from time to time and he ponders ways to help me?
So even if I spend the next three years, looking for evidence that the above assumptions are correct, I suspect that I won’t find any evidence that he cares either.
So I’ll never really know one way or the other.
Set of #1 assumptions certainly feel safer. But after three years of getting nowhere with them, is it time to try something different? Even just for the heck of it.
So what’s the harm in trying #2? Even if the assumptions are wrong, what does it matter? What will happen if I assume he cares and at then some point I find evidence that proves I am wrong? Well then I will change my assumption at that point
But in the meantime, faced with the lack of any evidence…
Is this stupid? Sort of like believing in God, even though you really don’t, because it makes you feel better?
I guess I am curious if there will be any changes in our interactions if I just go to therapy assuming he cares.
Any thoughts?
poster:cricket
thread:546520
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050824/msgs/546520.html