Posted by Blossom on August 24, 2005, at 21:43:34
In reply to How common is it, really?, posted by All Done on August 17, 2005, at 2:26:18
Here's a perspective:
I think therapists know it happens all the time because it happens to them all the time too. That's something my own therapist told me. I think I already shared this story, but to summarize, one day, pretty much out of the blue, and not really related to anything we were talking about, he said, "Blossom, if you ever do counselling, you need to be very careful, because you will meet bright, articulate people who will push your buttons. You need to know your own needs and weaknesses or you could get yourself into a lot of trouble. I personally often find myself becoming attracted to depressed women between 40 and 55 years old."
So there you have it. It happens to them probably as often as it happens to us. I thought later that this statement was a virtual admission of his attraction to me (by the way, I have never admitted any sexual attraction to him, although I have shown and told him that I love him, and I think he knows that I would never, ever act on his attraction anyway).
But generally, I think that good therapists make a point of never admitting this to us clients, so we don't really think of the countertransference as happening as much as it probably does. They probably have better coping mechanisms to deal with the feelings than most of us do, 'cause they've been through this so often. But it's kinda fun to think about your T fantasizing about you, isn't it?
Blossom
poster:Blossom
thread:542808
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050824/msgs/546328.html