Posted by ClearSkies on August 24, 2005, at 7:13:34
It was the best, most nuturing thing that has ever happened to me. I cried the entire session - guilt, relief, love, everything all jumbled up.
The focus was two-fold: my husband perceives that I am not improving after 4+ years of psych meds and therapy in becoming more functional and a happier person. I have had 4 therapists in the last 2 years, and this latest T I have seen for 2, maybe 3 months, is the first I have trusted not to abandon me and whom I feel understand my dual dx of addiction and bipolar2.
The subject quickly moved on to my drinking; how it has changed since he met me; how it is right now (pretty bad), though I am not binging. He's going to try to help me find an out-patient programme to give me some coping skills. I've discussed some of my issues about this on the substance board, so I won't go into it here, but I have been looking for help for a long time, isolate myself very badly, and feel terribly guilty and ashamed about this illness; moreso than the mental illness.The acceptance and love I felt in the session was just overwhelming. To say I feel undeserving of it is an understatement; I am so glad my therapist forced this issue out into the open.
She asked if he would agree not to drink in front of me for a week to support my sobriety - and he agreed. He said he never really knew what an alcoholic was until he met me. ha ha ha.
I signed a disclosure agreement so she can discuss my case with my p-doc (the first T to ask to do this), and I see my p-doc next week. Jeez, I'm scared, but I feel a great big corner coming up that I really want to get around.I'm so glad I have this therapist right now. I wish she could have been my mother.
poster:ClearSkies
thread:545980
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050824/msgs/545980.html