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Re: It's all ok now » Shortelise

Posted by jammerlich on July 18, 2005, at 21:53:40

In reply to It's all ok now, posted by Shortelise on July 18, 2005, at 19:13:05

(((((Shorte)))))

I'm so happy for you that things are feeling better. It sounds like you both worked so hard and that must feel satisfying.

What he said about being an apologetic nurturer and wanting to talk on a higher level has got me to thinking. I'm wondering if it has to be either-or? If it does, that makes me sad. It seems to me that in order to be a truly whole person, we have to accept *all* parts of ourselves - whether they are childlike or all grown up. So that means that we'll have moments where we need nurturing and moments where we need the higher level stuff.

That's what scares me about therapy in general. From my own experience (and according to a lot of what I read here), it seems like T's can start off very nurturing and then come to a point where they shut all that off and expect grown-up and self-sufficient all the time. In my mind, *that* is what looks all black and white. And that is what makes me afraid I'm going to "lose" something or be abandoned. I think it would make more sense if they sprinkled therapy with both all along, so that there was never some big change or loss. It just seems more like how real life is and more conducive to this interdependency thing I keep hearing about.

And what you said about your mother and loving to kiss your pink toes has me weeping. Do you feel like she loved you that way? I think that is beautiful and I must admit that I'm a little envious.

 

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