Posted by alexandra_k on July 4, 2005, at 19:31:06
In reply to Re: sigh » alexandra_k, posted by Damos on July 4, 2005, at 17:59:39
Hello.
I was wondering whether you were still around. Glad that you are :-)>She is probably also experiencing some self doubt about her ability to help you and the 'launching in to the critique' may have been a defensive reaction to doubting her own competence.
Yeah. I think so. It actually turned into a really interesting discussion... But side-tracked from therapy rather, I guess. I have a couple friends in the Master of Councelling program and have been reading some of that post-modernist critique. There are some good points - but then there is a middle way too. Actually... It probably was useful to talk about that. Part of sorting out what I want from therapy and how I want things to go etc. It is a kind of mixed blessing... That she is willing to listen to what I do want and think I need without the threat of termination if I don't tell her what she wants to hear. For the first time in my life I can actually be honest there. But... I'm not sure that she can deliver... But... I guess when it really does come down to it I just want someone to be able to walk with me for a while. And I do believe she can be really good there.
>knowing that x happened and you said you feel sh*t doesn't tell her that yep this hurts and is hard but needs to be talked about now, or it hurts and is hard but I'm okay with it at the moment and I can't afford to go back there right now.
Yeah. I tried to tell her the latter was the case. But I don't think she believed me. I think she thought I was trying to wheedle out of talking about something that I really needed to talk about. Maybe I'll print off the last email I sent him and give that to her. Then to say that I think I've sorted it to my satisfaction. But that I realise it will probably come up at some point - and then I'll tell her.
Yeah. There is a lot of stuff going on...Yeah, the minefield analogy sounds about right :-)
> Sorry, this has turned into a gibbering ramble so I'll shut up.
Not at all.
Good to hear from you.
Thanks.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:523150
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050628/msgs/523477.html