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Re: Therapy was disappointing again today » Dinah

Posted by crushedout on June 27, 2005, at 17:59:32

In reply to Re: Therapy was disappointing again today » crushedout, posted by Dinah on June 27, 2005, at 17:40:00

> I had that feeling recently, and it turned out to be because he was closing himself off to keep a secret from me.
>
> I'm not saying that your therapist is keeping a secret, but maybe that she's closing herself up. There's a real talent to being a blank slate, or at least keeping the boundaries up, while also being open and receptive and welcoming. Has your therapist ever been able to do that?

Hmm, I think she's open and receptive and welcoming, yes. But she refuses to judge anything. I ask her if I'm crazy and she says she doesn't know and she doesn't see it as her job to decide that. Which makes sense. I dyed my hair yesterday and it looks really amazing and she won't say that she likes it. I also understand why she won't do that. And given what happened with the last T, I really think it's for the best. But sometimes it leaves me feeling really empty.

How did you find out your T was keeping a secret? What kind of secret? Did he tell you what it was?

See, my T would never let me know that there was something going on with her. I went from one extreme to the next: the last T told me way too much, and this one tells me nothing, so it feels like I'm pouring all my feelings into an abyss, a nonhuman. She doesn't even care about me. She's just a blackboard. What's that?

Argh.


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