Posted by Jazzed on May 29, 2005, at 18:02:08
In reply to Re: I think I may be ready to give up my plan » Jazzed, posted by Dinah on May 29, 2005, at 10:05:26
> Yes, he knows to hospitalize me if he terminates me. I've reiterated that several times.
>
> But I could have never told him the plan, because then it would be a threat, and it was never meant to be a threat or to manipulate.
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> I think even telling him in retrospect might fall into that category. Plus, he really would get angry, and all for no purpose. Since I'm ready to put the plan aside.
>
> The only point in sharing it at this point would be to rejoice that I'm ready to put it aside. I'm not sure even those posters who've been around a long time and have known that I've clung to this plan know how much a part of my everyday background thinking it was. To be ready to let go of this important safety net says a lot about how secure I feel.
>
> And no, I'm not afraid he'd be more likely to terminate me if I tell him. First of all because I believe him when he says that any termination will come from me, unless he moves or retires or dies. And second... I think he'd recognize that giving up the plan didn't mean it would hurt less to lose him. It says more about how I think losing him would come about. I think it says that I think it would come about in such a way that I wouldn't feel such rage that would drive the plan.
>
> I don't know. I think I understand in my mind, but it's hard to grasp the words to describe it.I'm so glad you're thinking of giving it up! Tears of joy, tears of joy! I think I misunderstood. I have found you to be ..... for lack of a better word, delightful! I'm sure there would be horrendous sadness for anyone if this plan transpired.
What ever happened that you decided on this plan?
Jazzed
poster:Jazzed
thread:504109
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050528/msgs/504893.html