Posted by pinkeye on May 24, 2005, at 15:10:22
In reply to Emotional nurturing of ourselves, posted by pinkeye on May 24, 2005, at 15:00:18
Atleast hereafter.. I am going to take care of myself so very well. Instead of expecting my dad or my ex T or my husband to make me happy. I mean, if my dad - in spite of all that abuse he did to me and my mom, can be happy - why should I not?
I think my dad kind of tried to force me to be happy - he would never let me cry or be weak or sentimental or emotional. I think he tried to force it down my throat to be strong and powerful and intelligent and happy.. And I ended up pretending exactly like that, whereas I really was very weak and emotional and scared and didn't even want to be happy because it was so impossible in that circumstance. and I think I developed even an aversion to being happy - because I was forced to pretend like I am happy. Maybe now I need not continue to do that.
But now I am free of my dad, and I am an adult, maybe I can try a little bit to be emotionally happy myself.
Just talking to myself - as usual:-)
poster:pinkeye
thread:502288
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050521/msgs/502293.html