Posted by LittleGirlLost on May 13, 2005, at 12:16:38
Bathroom Stuff!
Ugh!
Anyone else have "issues" with public bathrooms?
Here's the thing:
Within the next several months, my job is going to be transferring me to our other office. I'm not looking forward to it at all, but my immediate/biggest concern is the bathroom situation. Where I work now, it's private; one stall, which I am relatively okay with. Where I'm going has about 3-4 stalls and I am completely freaking out!I did bring this up with my T, but I am too embarrassed to even talk about it! :(
It's not like I'm worrying about germs... I'm fearful of the vulnerability, the noise, ugh I don't even know! I can't "go" when people are in there with me; I just can't. And I never use anyones bathroom when I go over their house; strangely, that is when I prefer the public bathroom.
I went out to eat with a friend recently and afterwards we were going back to her house. I had to go to the bathroom, and she knows about my "thing". So I asked her not to come with me (like we women usually do, lol). She told me I could wait till we got back to her house and go there (thinking it'd be easier for me). But somehow for me, that was worse! Like then you will really know what I am doing! I was raised to be so embarrassed by "normal" bodily functions, that I would actually deny that I do such things. (And yes I've tried to do this when I was younger.) Oh and forget about when I have my period, or tummy troubles. (sorry, tmi) Lordy, I am going to give myself an anxiety attack just thinking about it!
Even when I am going to T appts, sometimes I have to go. Rather than use her nice, clean, pretty, private, bathroom (her office is in her house and has a bathroom); I stop at a fast food place along the way and use the bathroom there! Only two stalls which would normally be a problem, but fortunately there's never been anyone in there yet! But strange how I prefer that.
Yet, I can go to a MLB Baseball game where there's like 30 stalls, and I am okay because I feel like I blend in!! (So the 3 stalls at this new office location is totally freaking me out!)
It's so weird, yet has me completely freaking out because I have to resolve this before I move my office, but I don't know how when I cant even seem to talk about it with my therapist.
Please please please, can anyone relate, shed some light, anything?
(a very scared and sad) ~LGL
poster:LittleGirlLost
thread:497343
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050513/msgs/497343.html