Posted by pinkeye on May 9, 2005, at 15:01:05
In reply to Re: Tommorrow is the day, and more babbling, posted by happyflower on May 9, 2005, at 14:49:19
I understand what you mean. It is awfully horrible to put a child through that - I would never ever put my child through any difficulty. I don't have a kid as of now, but I feel so protective about my future kid even now.
But on the other hand I feel, that if my ex T hadn't intervened in my life 2 - 3 years back, maybe I would have gone on to become an evil mom and a bad person myself. I was getting very mentally sick and throwing things at everyone and crumbling down under the full pressure, and I was really being extremely bad towards my husband. And guess what, I didn't do it voluntarily. I had no clue how to take all the stress. Maybe your mom or dad were operating out of their own lacking and didnt know how to deal with the stress. That is the way I try to see my dad's behaviour nowadays. That whatever he did, he did out of his own inadequacies, and not because of me. Plus, they didn't have access to all these therapies and internet and so much of knowledge. So there was no way they could have corrected them.
My dad did have access to lot of resources, and he could have listened to someone else - like my grandfather who constantly told him not to touch a girl child too much.. I think it was not enough for him.
You never know why a person behaves the way they do.. Why they love us, but end up hurting us. Nowadays I feel that the only way I can deal with all these stuff, is putting all my hard stuff at the feet of God. It is really helping me a lot.. Every week, I go to a temple here, and I just put all the problems I have in God's feet. And that actually works for me. Instead of thinking that I am taking care of all my issues, and my father and mother, it is better to think that I am just going through the motions of life as best as I know, and I just try to put all my problmes and entrust God with it and let him take care of it. It works for me, and I am more peaceful now, because of it. I am not a fanatic relious person, but this kind of moderate belief helps a lot.
poster:pinkeye
thread:495607
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050504/msgs/495618.html