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Re: continuing pattern » pinkeye

Posted by Tamar on May 9, 2005, at 3:34:09

In reply to continuing pattern » Tamar, posted by pinkeye on May 8, 2005, at 11:37:50

Wow, that’s far from ideal. I understand that it’s a duty to support your parents, but maybe there’s a difference between sending your dad money that he really needs and sending him money that you know he’s going to squander?

The thing about an inheritance is that it’s supposed to be looked after from one generation to the next, in my view. Shouldn’t he be trying to ensure that his inheritance and your mother’s inheritance eventually become your inheritance?

And what will happen when you go back to India? Won’t you have financial responsibilities towards you husband’s parents, if you’re going to be living with them? Will you actually be able to support your parents as well?

And I also worry about what will happen if you have children one day. At that point, you’ll want to be able to support your children.

I know I’m coming at this from a different cultural perspective, but it seems to me that children shouldn’t be financially responsible for their parents at this stage in life. Maybe when the parents get quite old. Then it’s different; of course it’s a duty to support them. But if your father is capable of working?

The whole thing sounds very problematic, and frustrating for you. Have you talked to your T about it? Maybe you can try to figure out a way to make your dad depend on you less.


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