Posted by Tamar on April 5, 2005, at 21:45:36
In reply to counter tranference, posted by happyflower on April 5, 2005, at 19:57:37
I'm not an expert at this transference/counter-transference stuff, but I did feel a sense of deja-vu when I read your post. My own experience was not unlike the situation you describe.
I'm curious that you mention counter-transference rather than transference. Could your experience be rooted in transference?
It's entirely possible, of course, that your T finds you attractive, but if he's a good T he'll never tell you (I hate that!).> How can you get rid of my feelings? I feel like a young school girl having a crush. Should I discuss with my T?
I don't know if you can ever get rid of the feelings entirely, but from what I hear, discussing it with your therapist is probably a step in the right direction for understanding and resolving your feelings.
Most therapists are able to deal with their clients' feelings sensitively and professionally, and your T should be able to help you explore the basis of your attraction. I tend to think that attraction is often just a basic biological matter, but if you're attracted to your T there may be other underlying factors to take into account.
>It is kinda weird that I would be so attracted to him when I truely am happy in my marriage.
Therapy involves much weirdness. But also, it might be kinda weird if you were never attracted to people other than your partner.
If you feel able to do it, you might want to consider talking to your T about it. But I have to admit, I decided against confessing. For what it's worth, I now sometimes wish I'd said something. I tried to deal with it alone, and I'm sure it would have been easier for me if I'd brought it up with my T. Most people who discuss it with their T have said that it leads to increased trust and understanding.
I hope this helps a bit.
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:480389
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050329/msgs/480465.html