Posted by corafree on February 25, 2005, at 14:07:14
In reply to ((((corafree)))), posted by gardenergirl on February 24, 2005, at 9:01:33
Gardender girl and anyone else I've not responded to, I apologize.
I'm fragile, but showered, had my hair washed and blown dry (it is too long and can't do w/ my back injury), packed a weekend, and am heading out east where my three children all live separately.
I've prob' lost 8lbs, making me about 100lbs, but I am 5'4". Anxiety just below the skin w/ a few strong attacks.
Unfortunately, unless I say I am suicidal, I cannot get hospitalization for a jump start. I considered Outpatient treatment and called my caseworker, but he and I agreed I probably cannot do the driving back and forth.
My insurance company cannot tell me where I could go and receive my Percocet at the same time. This, the Percocet, is another reason I don't do a lot of driving.
It's too bad that we 'must say we are suicidal', 'be suicidal', or have 'attempted suicide' to qualify for care.
I wonder, do only the rich have this luxury (as if it is a luxury!!)?
I plan to write a letter about this issue to the/my State insurance, the/my State mental health system, and send ccs to whomever it takes.
My SSD is just over poverty level, maybe I told you, so I do not qualify for 'free' care except @ State hospital. I am not bragging, believe me, but I have a high-functioning mental illness, and am sorely out of place in a this State hospital. I have seen the entry and a connected bathroom, and it is frightening and disgusting. I turned around and ran out of there.
I have the info you all have given me for resource. I did not yet contact NAMI, but will take that on very soon, a day I am feeling I can gather myself properly.
I am so glad I threw up. I think I threw up 'bad life issues', 'my tire of meds', 'grief, sadness, and anger.'
I am continuing my meds as presribed.
I would like to have more IRLs, but truly you are as close, and sometimes closer, in my life. As I write you, I am, myself, revisiting my issues and seeing myself. Sometimes talking, I do not listen to myself.
This weekend I'll try to listen to my children.
love and thanks all, cf
poster:corafree
thread:460049
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050225/msgs/463187.html