Posted by 10derHeart on February 24, 2005, at 21:14:08
In reply to Why Do I Feel Like This?, posted by 10derHeart on February 24, 2005, at 11:02:05
Thank you, thank you, thank you. You are all so wonderful. I was in tears by the time I got through your posts (Voce, you put me waaay over the edge, dear) - but those are my *good*, cleansing, "maybe they don't think I'm a complete whining baby and idiot," kind of tears.
I've had lots of water, a nap and better food. I feel more steady, though numb. (Funny, my T. asked me yesterday - rather out of the blue - if I was physically and emotionally exhausted, and I brushed him off) I want to respond to each of you, but tonight I may just rest and go to bed. Insomnia has been crippling lately.
In the past few hours, big surprise, I think I've realized several things that probably triggered this. And they are so obvious, I could just laugh at myself - if my laughing muscles were working. I promise I'll share them when I've got a little more energy later.
I love you guys. Do you know when emptiness, stress and confusion set in, causing me to post in frustration like that, how healing it is to come to this board and see these responses? Of course you know. Leaves me overwhelmed with gratitude and wanting to hug all of you at once... (((SusanMissHoneypinkeyevoce)))
(Uh, can you all breathe in there, you're kind of all squished together...? (hey, is that my sense of humor creeping back weakly? oh my, I've missed that)
PS - My sweet daughter turned 23 today. She knows some of how I was feeling, and in her wonderful, direct, confident, practical way offered this, "Mom, maybe you just feel so bad because mailing me things and being on the phone aren't good enough, or what you want. You really miss me a lot on my birthday and don't realize it, but it's coming out anyway?"
Smart*ss? Or just darn smart?
poster:10derHeart
thread:462668
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050218/msgs/462958.html