Posted by Susan47 on February 1, 2005, at 19:14:47
In reply to FOR NIMROD, posted by Miss Honeychurch on February 1, 2005, at 15:37:58
I think you're terribly brave ((((Miss Honey)))). I wish I could do it all without the AD's and the drugs. Sunny knows, she's been there and seen both sides of me ... other people have too, and I wonder if they know it. Not many, though, because mostly I have to be stoned to be able to go out ... at least a little bit stoned, you know, because otherwise I don't have the confidence, or self-liking, or ease or grace to be myself. I know people here struggle with being unable to leave their homes, and unable to reach out for help when they really need it and they Know they will benefit from asking for help, but it's just too much effort, it's too hard to do ....
and some part of me understands it, and is so grateful that I can still have my crutches, the crutches that allow me to reach out and post when I need to, to survive ... Babble is a needed addiction, so are my drugs, and I'm really ashamed of that, I'm not proud of any of it, but it helps me be a better mother and a better human being right now, when I need it the most ...
poster:Susan47
thread:451116
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050129/msgs/451280.html