Posted by corafree on October 25, 2004, at 0:39:26
In reply to Re: gg, DBT (long and packed with quotes), posted by gardenergirl on October 24, 2004, at 16:01:50
Hi gg!
I went to see my DBT therapist, as do every Weds. I was very sad over three+ issues worrying about. As time was runniing out, my T, upon arising from her chair, and I mine, looked at me and w/ a slight weird smile said, "you need to toughen up!" It didn't hit me until 5m later what she'd said. Then, I became angry. I asked to speak to the director. Director not there. Asked to speak to my therapist, but busy w/ her next client. My group begins an hr after individ. therapy, so one of my group leaders, the most kind and seriously caring professional I've met there, said I could speak with her.
I told her how invalidated I felt when she said, "you need to toughen up", w/ her crooked smurk. She said, "I understand how you must feel." I said, yes, it was like having someone say to you, after the death of a loved one, "you'll get over it." And she nodded, yes, that she agreed.
Tomorrow is Mon morn and as of yet, I have not spoken w/ my T or the director. This is the first time (been in individ. therapy maybe 8 wks, group I think 4 wks) she has straight out been disrespectful of my feelings. I must speakup re: my feelings, but wonder if I should go straight to the supervisor.
Your post was very, very helpful. I knew that the relationship was to be one of a kind and caring one, and my T leans a bit away from that, not way away, but a bit.
I've been in regular 'talk about the goings-ons therapy' before and have had very poor, nonempathetic, therapists; and wonderful empathetic therapists.
This is my first experience with DBT and I was so looking forward to something that might just work.
At the time of this visit, I had asked her about seeing another therapist to just 'talk about the goings-ons' in my life; as my therapist and I concentrate on dissecting one issue into its emotion and function. She said that is not ethical.
Any feedback for my thoughts? tks cf
poster:corafree
thread:406630
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041016/msgs/406867.html