Posted by CareBear04 on September 3, 2004, at 0:31:22
In reply to Male or female -- does it matter?, posted by Aphrodite on August 30, 2004, at 18:01:56
ooh, interesting reading!
even though i have lots of girlfriends, there are a lot of times when i prefer male company and i think there's something about male attention that i enjoy. i know that sounds bad, but in terms of medical care, my male drs have generally been more interested and attentive and spend more time in consultation with me. i think there are some subjects that are just universally awkward to discuss, and the gender of the dr doesn't usually define whether i'll respond to questions or avoid them. i've had an amazing female pdoc who got me back on track, but i never felt comfortable discussing sex, female problems, contraception, or anything of the sort because she was almost too nice and warm-- very motherly, and i don't talk about stuff like that with my mom, and i didn't want her to think less of me. in contrast, the dr she referred me on to is male, and after awhile, i felt comfortable talking to him about all those things, though i rarely brought the subjects up myself. he was first described to me as "irreverent," and he is blunt, impossible to shock, and he has a much dirtier mouth than i have, which first surprised and then amused me and actually made me more comfortable, like i was talking to a friend rather than a paid professional. i guess some people would rather have the boundaries drawn differently.also, i think for me it's not so much the gender of the dr that matters but the age. i used to feel comfortable seeing men of all ages, but recently, i had a really bad experience with an older male dr (maybe mid-60s?) who made rude remarks about how i'm on more psych meds than anyone he's ever seen and how messed up i must be. my first time in the hospital, i was in a mostly adolescent program, and the two drs who consulted were both old men who gave me candy and patted me on the head but otherwise told me that they were sorry they couldn't help me and that these were supposed to be the best years of my life. i've also had bad experiences with older women pdocs who acted like they had something to prove and never listened to me. otherwise, younger men and women drs usually work out equally well for me, but all else equal, i would probably choose the man.
poster:CareBear04
thread:384279
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040828/msgs/385885.html