Posted by thewrite1 on August 9, 2004, at 23:53:28
I had a rough session a couple days ago. I have a lot of rage and I have a lot of trouble expressing anger. My T knows this and she pushed me pretty hard. In fact, I screamed at her "Would you back the @!*# off!" She refused (which she's never done before). Things just got worse for me after that. I left feeling like I was going to explode. I avoided contact with people because I didn't want to snap anyone's head off over this. Finally this morning I called my T and told her that "when you leave the cage door open, sooner or later the lion will come out and eat someone." I explained that I'm feeling really angry and it's making EVERYTHING else harder for me. I asked her to call me back if she has any input. She hasn't called. I'm sure she'll call tomorrow, but I guess I'm just not feeling the love. Now I'm wondering if I should have called at all. I've been seeing her for nearly 4 years and this is the 3rd time I've called when it wasn't about scheduling stuff, so I don't do it that often. I'm really feeling hurt that she opened up all this anger and pushed me the way she did and now she can't even find the time to return my call. This is why I doubted calling in the first place.
poster:thewrite1
thread:375849
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040805/msgs/375849.html