Posted by LG04 on June 28, 2004, at 10:18:24
Hi, I'm just looking for a bit of comfort from people who I know understand.
I am very attached to my therapist yet I am leaving for two months to go to America, my home. That in and of itself is very upsetting and makes me feel sad and scared -- what will I do without her for two months, and I will miss her SO much. But the other thing is that I am not even 100% sure if I am coming back. I am very torn between moving back home or staying here where I'm at. So when I have my session with her on Thursday, I don't even know if it's my final session or if it's a "last-session-of-two-month-break" session.
She said I can call her from America as much as I need to. (though we agreed it wouldn't be good for me to call her every day, which I probably wouldn't do anyway) If I decide to stay there, we'll figure out together what to do regarding closure and so on.
It's a very strange position to be in, though obviously it's of my own making because I just can't decide what to do and I want to go to America and see what it feels like before I make any decision.
But the sadness of missing my therapist (today I clung to her crying) -- with an aside that even though I know she will miss me, I am sure she won't miss me as much as I will miss her and that makes me upset -- and the fear that I will decide to stay...
As I said, I just wanted to tell you all because I know that you understand and I guess that's important to me right now. I tell others, "it's so hard to leave my therapist" and they nod but they don't get it.
I am also afraid she will forget about me and not care about me so much anymore, which she absolutely says won't happen. But I fear it anyway.
Thanks for listening.
LG
poster:LG04
thread:361302
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040624/msgs/361302.html