Posted by daisym on June 24, 2004, at 19:08:59
In reply to The RonCo Inside-The-Eggshell-Egg-Scrambler, posted by Racer on June 24, 2004, at 15:51:09
Racer,
I agree with Antigua. It is always useful to "get things out there" even if they aren't loaded emotionally. It helps in another way, and that is, your Therapist begins to figure out how you put words together to describe things. I believe we all have our own "code" so to speak, so she needs to figure out yours. The shared experience of talking helps build trust and not every exchange needs to be emotional.
Once she knows your story and you've built the trust, she can help get to your feelings if and when she thinks this is helpful and necessary.
When I went to therapy today, I told my therapist I should be mad at him because yesterday he made me cry. He said he figured I would be, since he had pulled out his psych. crowbar and pried my feelings loose but he said he felt it was best for me if he didn't allow me to pretend I was "fine." (I have a daily trigger going on that I can't avoid right now.)
Yesterday I told him that the reason I needed to contain the feelings and just stay with the facts was because these deep feelings were from the little girl inside and they threatened to overwhelm everything (I think I called them a tidal wave) and drown her and me and everyone I shared them with. He told me I had to trust that he could handle them, that he had taken advanced lifesaving and was a strong swimmer and he wouldn't let her, or me drown. He was using his best, gentle voice, talking to her about how hurt she was and how betrayed she must feel...THAT'S what made me cry!
But, he didn't do that to me when we first started together. He "just" listened and let me talk about stuff. You can't "race" to the finish line of feeling better. Unfortunately. So don't beat yourself up about what you didn't do yesterday. Congratulate yourself for what you did do!
I think you were very brave!
Daisy
poster:daisym
thread:359879
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040624/msgs/359958.html