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Re: Negative transference/anger at therapist

Posted by pegasus on June 6, 2004, at 16:22:32

In reply to Negative transference/anger at therapist, posted by LG04 on June 6, 2004, at 11:53:38

Yes, I've been there too. And my T said a similar thing. He said that part of what we learn in therapy is that there can be a relationship where anger happens, and the relationship can be large enough to contain it. So, although sometimes he would become irritated or frustrated with me, he still liked me overall. That's a lesson that was *hard* to learn, but very valuable. And if he had hidden all of his frustration, I wouldn't have learned it.

Which is not to say that a therapist should always show exactly what they're feeling. I think they do have to be very careful to match what we're able to handle. But it sounds like you've been very close to your T in the past. So maybe she thinks you are at a point where you are able to not only express your anger at her, but maybe also to witness her defensiveness, or irritation at you. And how that doesn't destroy your relationship.

pegasus

 

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