Posted by Pandabear on May 10, 2004, at 16:37:55
I havent been posting lately because Im finding myself to be doing much better but the fact that im doing better is scaring me. I dont know what to do with myself. I can tell that my medicine is working and it is making me less anxious and less needy of my therapist but at the same time, I want to need my therapist. I have gone from needing to see her or talk to her all the time to feeling like I dont need to speak to her and that is just weird for me. I see her once a week..which i guess i could start backing off but I know that once I do that..Im going to wish I hadnt and then I WILL Start obsessing and worrying again, Realizing that I cannot get in to see her. I am on a waiting list to see her this week but nothing has come open yet..I think that just knowing that I have appts scheduled with her is what is making things better and less stressful for me. Maybe that is it. I just have never felt like I didnt need someone ..I am so co dependent and Im feeling like I dont need her ...
I think therapy is really odd...when you arent in a session with your therapist, and you are in the "real world" it is like (at least for me) that I put up a mask and everyone around me feels or sees a certain way about me...even my family yet when i go into therapy ..my true feelings come out...and if I was feeling depressed or sad about something...that other people didnt see..my therapist would see it. Even though this is a good thing, it at times has made me leave therapy more upset than when I went in...it is weird. Has anyone else felt this way? ...
Overall im doing good..I just havent felt like this in a while and it is kind of scary...
poster:Pandabear
thread:345489
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040503/msgs/345489.html