Posted by noa on March 2, 2004, at 18:38:09
In reply to Don't chase deer » terrics, posted by badhaircut on February 27, 2004, at 21:41:15
I think that more research is needed to understand how traumatic memories are processed. I do believe it is possible for people to repress traumatic memories.
I did like your analogy of the deer. And although I do think it can be important to process memories of past experiences (and that there are people who do have repressed or difficult-to-access memories that can shed light on their difficulties), I agree that it can be easy to get stuck on the idea of needing to uncover that one thing, THE KEY to solving all the puzzles of one's difficulties, some kind of romanticized deep dark secret, that once discovered will reveal all the why's and wherefore's and put all the pieces in place, lead the way to the cure, resolve all the issues.
For me, it was important to come to grips with the ordinariness of my pains and hurts and to accept that there isn't likely to be that secret code to feeling different. It was really about accepting myself and letting go of the idea of finding the magical secret to free me of the bad feelings. It was about accepting that these feelings are here and I can tolerate them and live with them and manage them.
I think this idea of the "holy grail" of psychotherapeutic discovery through uncovering is also perpetuated by romantic portrayals of the process in literature and movies. Two examples readily come to mind, and I'm sure we can come up with many more---"August" by Judith Rossner, Mariner Books; (September 1997) and "Prince of Tides".
I guess it also seems similar to how fairy tales work--kind of like, "If only we can figure out who the prince/frog is that knows the true secret to how I became imprisoned in this miserable existence and is therefore destined to find the magical key and free me from the shackles of my painful emotional life, etc........"
poster:noa
thread:318184
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040225/msgs/319486.html