Posted by Waterlily on February 27, 2004, at 17:02:55
I haven't posted lately because I've been doing really well. Just a brief overview: I'm the daughter of a depressed alcoholic father who commmitted suicide when I was 14. Mom was pretty good, but relied on me heavily for psychological support after my dad died. I maybe had low-grade depression through high school and college, but first experienced a major depression deep enough for me to seek treatment after the birth of my second child when I was 25. I've been more or less happily married since age 20 and am now 35. I have been on antidepressants for 9+ years now continuously and have tried on occasion to get off the meds. My 12 year old daughter has been diagnosed with depression, OCD, and ADHD. My 9 year old daughter has none of these problems.
I was told by two psychiatrists that I did not need psychological therapy, but three years ago asked my current psychiatrist for a referral to a psychologist, at the urging of my husband. My therapist first told me that she could get me to the point where I no longer would need medication. I've experienced some major dips within the past couple of years, most recently this fall when I experienced a fairly significant depression. I've never been hospitalized. I've been doing wonderfully since the addition of Luvox in December. My mom tried to put me on a guilt trip for not letting her take my kids far away for two weeks, but I didn't feel guilty at all. I felt great. I also put my foot down with my eye doctor because he's having me use an extremely expensive medication that isn't helping (trust me when I say I'm not doing any damage to myself by not using cyclosporine in my eyes - I'm continuing to follow up with another eye doc on this matter). It felt good to stand up for myself that way. It's not been very long since the depression , so I was a little surprised when my therapist brought up the idea of ending therapy when I saw her last week. There was a time when this would have scared me. There was a time when I worried about how I would deal with ending therapy, but I was thrilled when she brought it up last week. I told her that I wanted to be done with therapy. That seemed to be a bit of a shock to her. I told her that I thought I'd still need to see my psychiatrist for medication, but that I didn't have anything more I felt needed to be dealt with in therapy. I could be wrong, but I think there's a difference between psychological issues that I deal with and psychiatric problems. I can usually tell what the problem is. She agreed that I should continue to see my psychiatrist and we have arranged for a final three once monthly therapy sessions, with options for more if needed. I'm so happy. I don't feel like I'm abnormally different from other people now. I feel like a regular person who has a right to occupy space on this planet. I'll still deal with everyday problems and I still may deal with psychiatric issues from time to time. I may even need a psychological "tune-up" from time to time, but I feel like it's time to end therapy.
Just thought I'd share the good news and hope I'm not writing back anytime soon eating the words I just typed.
poster:Waterlily
thread:318312
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040225/msgs/318312.html