Posted by Karen_kay on February 18, 2004, at 12:49:51
I have noticed that past 4 weeks at least we have gone over during our sessions. Usually about 15 minutes. He never charges me, except once when we went over 30 or 45 minutes. Is this weird? Just thinking about it....
And the session this morning.... He said the "ultimatum" (ie: work harder or I'm going to transfer you out) was his way of slapping my wrist and telling me to keep on the topic. I also noticed he became rather defensive when he brought up that I said he should divorce his wife... I smell problems in that area..
I asked him if he wanted me to leave my boyfriend (this has nothing to do with his wife or marriage problems or anything, just changing topic..) and he said no, but he's a VERY bad liar. Probably the worst liar I've ever seen.. I asked him that because I told him about an innocent conversation I had with a guy at the grocery and Bubba asked, "Did you get his number?" Now, I'm not inclined to ask for guy's numbers, so I saw it as yet another sign he wants me to leave my boyfriend. And only because I talk about the bad things. Again, what's the point in talking about the good things.....
OK, so here's the question of the day folks:
I fyou only talk about the things that need to be changed, how can you be certain your therapist is leading you in the right direction. For example, I only tell him the bad things about my boyfriend (his occassional temper tantrums, control and jealousy issues), so Bubba has a negative view of my boyfriend.... And he may persuade me to become less dependent and to finally leave him because "I can do better" And I honestly feel that he is trying to persuade me to leave my boyfriend. He's suggested getting an apartment if I do, that type of thing.... And my relationship with my boyfriend is suffereing because I keep thinking, "Well Bubba thinks I can do better." But, what if my current boyfriend is a good match? ANd I'm the one with all the problems? I mean I've kinda trained him to be the way he is.
So, how can they give accurate advice and guidance when they only see the bad and not the things that are good? I know I occassionaly talk about the good things, but we focus more on the bad.... Understand, rubberband?
poster:Karen_kay
thread:315160
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040218/msgs/315160.html