Posted by Penny on December 12, 2003, at 9:04:56
Does my T read Psychological Babble? I kinda hope so...I've mentioned it to her. It would be so much easier than my having to tell her all of these things face to face, though I guess that would be more therapeutic... :-)
Well, she gave me more of what I wanted last night - more concrete ideas on things I can do to help myself. She prefaced by saying, "I shouldn't be giving you career advice..." and then proceeded to tell me her thoughts about some programs in the area that would allow me to work with children. I appreciate the input. I'm always looking for new ideas - I may still go to social work school, but I'm not closing myself off to other possibilities.
Anyway, she said a couple of things that I hadn't thought of, but that made perfect sense. Let's see if I can remember them...
I was talking about how it seems I should have learned by now how to prioritize and manage my time better and not procrastinate...I continue to put myself in these positions of having projects to do and then not getting them done on time, and it's been a real problem with all three jobs I've had (in my field) since college. At first she said, "It's not about learning..." and then elaborated to say that it doesn't help for me to be beating myself up about all of this. I said, "Well, I guess I just keep thinking something should 'click.'" and she said, "What would that click be?" and I said something about how I would figure out how to not procrastinate, etc., and she said, "Or maybe you would realize that what you need is a job without so many deadlines and projects." I told her that in my field, I don't think those jobs exist, and she said maybe not, but there are other fields where you go to work and you 'do what you do' and then you go home. And, yes, there might be paperwork involved, but for the most part you perform a service or task of some kind and that's your job. She used her own job as an example, and nursing. She said that she's not good with projects and deadlines either, and she doesn't have to deal with them too much in her field.
And I hadn't thought about it that way before, but she's right. I don't do well with deadlines. I'm not a very organized person, and I don't know that I ever will be. It's something I've always admired about other people, but a talent I don't seem to possess. And I guess maybe being organized is not the only key to success and happiness, eh?
There was another point she made last night, but for the life of me I can't remember it at the moment. I hate that...maybe it will come to me.
Anyway, then I got home and checked the mail and there was a brochure from a school in Chicago, the Erikson Institute, that apparently offers master's degrees and Ph.D.s in child development-related topics. And they offer a joint M.S. in child development /MSW in clinical social work with Loyola University in Chicago. And I thought...hmmm...not that I'm looking to move any time soon, but...the family I used to nanny for is moving to Chicago soon, so it's not like I wouldn't know anyone there. Hmmm...hadn't ever really thought about that...but I guess it's something to consider.
In the meantime, I need to focus on getting through the holidays (sigh), and my T is going to be gone for 2 weeks!!! ACK!!!! She asked if my pdoc was going to be around, and I told her that he said he would. I guess it will be okay, though not easy. But at least I'm feeling better today than I was yesterday and the day before. 'Course, Fridays can have that effect.
And I guess I really need to get internet access at home so I can start looking for a job. Because it really doesn't make sense for me to stay where I am if I'm not happy here. I would like to leave under my own terms, which means I really need to get my work done and keep a low profile, but I think it makes sense for me to be looking at least. Keep my eyes open. And if it's in a field other than mine, all the better...
I'm glad my T was able to be more of what I needed her to be last night, without me having to tell her! Maybe she does read the board... hmmm....
I see my pdoc tonight.
P
poster:Penny
thread:289055
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031202/msgs/289055.html