Posted by Dinah on December 9, 2003, at 13:52:14
In reply to This made me feel better..., posted by Dinah on December 6, 2003, at 21:10:03
By the descriptions in the article, my dependency is a secure one. Yet... I still live in fear of abandonment, and I still can't internalize him very well - not for more than a few days really. I'm hypersensitive to whether or not he's "mad" at me.
But I acknowledge and have empathy for my dependency needs, accept the limits of therapy, control my dependency behaviors to a mutually tolerable level, allow deep dependency on my therapist while maintaining a (for me) normal life, can distinguish my dependency feelings from erotic feelings, can discuss my dependency issues easily, and my dependency on my therapist definitely promotes functioning and improvement in daily life. Straight out of the secure dependency column of that article. I couldn't answer yes to all of them, but I could for most.
Yet I still feel like the blind pup with the mother dog with him.
Does a secure dependency really feel this insecure?
If so, where is up from here? Secure independency? Secure attachment (as opposed to dependency)?
poster:Dinah
thread:287279
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031202/msgs/288041.html