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Re: Perfect Therapy Patient Club » Poet

Posted by fallsfall on October 29, 2003, at 16:48:01

In reply to Perfect Therapy Patient Club, posted by Poet on October 29, 2003, at 13:09:37

I've told my therapist the first time I saw him that I read Psychology books. He suggested "The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression". Which is a good overview of depression and treatments, and what it feels like. But, I knew all that stuff 8 years ago.

Then he was going on vacation and I asked for reading suggestions (so I could feel a connection to him while he was gone). He gave me the name of one book that I couldn't even find in the Library of Congress, and told me to read anything by Eric Erickson. I did read some, and it was interesting, but it wasn't "how therapy is done".

Last session I said again something about reading. He asked what I was reading. I told him that I read two kinds of books:

1. Comfort books for me are books for therapy patients about how therapy works (like "In Session") and books with case histories

2. Books written for therapists (the night before I had been reading "Psychodynamic Psychotherapy of Borderline Patients" by Kernberg.)

He said a couple of times that he was impressed that I could get through Kernberg. But I think that he doesn't think that I am terribly Borderline because he really wasn't sure that that book would help me with what we were doing. Finally he seemed to understand that I was going to read no matter what, and that he had the opportunity to steer me towards relevant books if he wanted. Otherwise, I would read whatever I could find. So he told me to read Kohut, "The Restoration of the Self". This is Psychology of the Self. I hadn't read any of that before, but it really makes a lot of sense. Finally he has figured out what I'm looking for.

I think that he doesn't want me reading, but realizes that I'm going to. It's a defense for me. It lets me feel like I'm figuring out how to be a perfect patient. Also, I read more when I'm not as confident that my therapist knows what to do - so that I can figure out what to tell them that will put them on the right track - or so I can figure out the problem myself. Thank goodness I have a card for a university library!

I raise your patheticness by a university library card!

 

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