Posted by allisonf on August 25, 2003, at 2:15:26
In reply to Re: Why bother with therapy? » allisonf, posted by stebby on August 24, 2003, at 20:01:45
Same here, my 1st infatuation like this was with a teacher in 6th grade. It was sometimes hard to distinguish them from ordinary crushes b/c they understandably created some of the same energy. The hypomania part for me is that these crushes recently cause my sleep schedule to be completely disrupted--I can't settle down from all the racing thoughts I have about what to say to them (I might pace while I go over this out loud/pressured speech), what I think will happen with them (which involves some level of gradiousity), etc. Fantasies I have about them end up with me having *so* much energy--sexual energy yes, but also feeling agitated or needing to write or exercise. I'd write 20 pages/day in my journal easy over something like that perfume incident. Also, I have felt the need to run a couple miles in the middle of the night, or do 100 situps at 3am, etc.
I'm not sure of the answer to the chicken/egg question about the hypomania/transference. I know that I do experience symptoms of hypomania in other contexts, which is why I don't really believe my diagnosis is too far off. But I do know that times when I am depressed or just normal, the infatuation with my therapist isn't nearly as intrusive. When I am in a hypomanic phase, I think they work in tandem--I'm primed to interpret what she does a certain way, then she does it, I'm full of energy reliving the conversation, we have another phonecall where she says something else...it just kind of feeds on itself, know what I mean? Have you had this kind of experience?
I do think it's common to fantasize about all kinds of things while you're having sex with your spouse--maybe even other people. But your therapist? I have the same doubts as you. Despite my earlier post, I haven't really gone that far.
You know, I just cked out In Session again tonight, and you're right, not a lot of "how tos" on getting past this thing. How did you resolve it with all the other crushes you had in your life? Mine were best resolved by walking away from those people. But then I was not as invested in those relationships nearly as much as I am with my therapist.
poster:allisonf
thread:251041
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030814/msgs/253787.html