Posted by kyp on March 6, 2003, at 16:57:03
In reply to Re: Why can't you see more than one therapist at once? » kyp, posted by Dinah on March 6, 2003, at 12:00:16
I have a great idea ! Join an art group or philosophy group or some other "deep thinkers 'club' " . Share and bounce ideas off each other, get closer, develope friendships... OR support groups sometimes develope deep enough relationships where you get some needs filled. It would not be one-on-one therapy, but maybe it would fulfill SOME of your desire to be heard and at the same time, you'd be surprised at how much YOU have to offer if expressed in a loving way.
My second therapist is more like a structured friendship without she bringing her problems to me, but she does bring joys and experiences to our relationship. This does not bog me down with the whole "obvious give and take" elements in a friendship, yet I consider her a friend. I have other friends that fulfill other needs in my life. She is one that fulfills a mentor role sort of I guess. I feel very accepted because she demonstrates that to me. I can express myself as much as I want, which is in a lot different way than I do with my "get down to work with this dissociative therapy" therapist. She is the one I do the "bookwork" type therapy with in the sense of reparenting and behavioral therapy and delving deep into "who" I am.In dealing with my own personal, internal issues, I learn how to have more effective interpersonal relationships.
The "creative" one has answers and ideas when I present frustrations in my relationships and listens more than most friends normally do. Thus, I PAY her and don't expect her to listen for free. They both are VERY special women and I'd say I am lucky, but I almost feel I've paid my debt in the going through h*ll trying to get good therapy over the last several years. They both find me interesting and enjoy their jobs of psychology anyway and are in it for the long haul which helps tremendously. I know what it is like to see "bad" therapists, flaky therapists, too busy therapists and too controlling ones and I have learned that if the fit is not there, to continue on. I would never have found my soulmate therapists that I have, had I not QUIT the ones I thought were ?good-enough-better-than-nothing! You are always entitled to interview other ones even though you are seeing your present one. That is not breaking any contract. Which in itself seems a little controlling. It is YOUR life to "mess up" (if that is what they are thinking)all you want. They are not in charge of your mental health even though you are seeking their expertise. You are paying them to help you feel comfortable in your own skin and if that ain't happening with them, run, don't walk to the nearest resource where you can find someone who will. They ARE out there, though seemingly few and far between.And they are worth their weight in gold if you feel the acceptance and trust you need to have in therapy.WOW, did I get up on the soapbox !!It was not geared AT anyone in particular, so if you don't feel it pertains, go to the next thing in your day and don't give it another thought. : ^) Anyway, I don't know if anyone will read this, but I said it anyway !
poster:kyp
thread:2321
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030203/msgs/206575.html