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Re: helping to get family to understand BP2--help!

Posted by vagen on December 13, 2002, at 6:14:18

In reply to Re: helping to get family to understand BP2--help!, posted by fuzzymind on December 13, 2002, at 1:53:53

I am 32. I have suffered from this since I was born. Of this I am sure.
I have three kids. AM married, work fulltime, blah blah blah.....
It just seems like they just don't care. So what mom is tired, so what I leave my crap everywhere. So what I didn't do my homework. SO what there are dishes. Mom can do it. I have finally figured out my triggers and am working so very hard to be healthy and I focus so much on maintaining a balance---but I can't do it alone and I need help. Both emot/physically. My husband can't understand why i can't ask for help. I told him, gee when I am thinkging about dying and the hardest thing I can do is brush my F******* teeth and get to work and maybe the kids will get their lunches---and you are off reading books and playing on the computer.....how can I possibly think to ask you for help?
We have been in counseling and the therapist finds a way to turn it on my and my illness.
I am on meds. I work out. I eat right. I try to get enough sleep. I have coping skills. I can communicate.
But, he just gets mad at me.
Like I really want to be this way. But, what really gets me is that why can't he come over to the other side and just once in a while understand I can't do it all.
I think my family is spoiled right now.
I think I have been too good to them from my feeling of guilt.
Maybe I need to go on vacation alone.

I just need validation. I just need understanding.
Last night for the first time since we have been married, (3 yrs) I cried. I bawled. He just stood there and looked at me.

That broke my heart.

Thanks for letting me rant.


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20021109/msgs/1817.html