Posted by sienna on September 27, 2002, at 21:00:51
In reply to Re: How do you know when to go to the hospital?, posted by madison88 on September 27, 2002, at 20:16:03
Thanks for writing me. I trust myself right now, but i have gone through all my old stuff and cleaned it out incase i do kill myself. Its bad,, but i dont want my family to have to deal with my old journals and things like that. I dont want them to read some of that stuff so Im throwing it away. Ive gone through most of it. Also, it was worse a few weeks ago, Im a litlte better, the Geodon is helping I think, but Im still really edgy. I am trying to figure out how to know when to go, because I thought i needed to go last time and I didnt' go but I was really wrecked after. And I exhausted some of my friends.Anyway, I have a psychologist and a psychiatrist and they are trying to keep me out of the hospital. It was frustrating because at first I thought my doctor wanted me to go, and i really didnt want to go, then when it got really bad, i wanted to go, but thought they didnt want me to. I do have a crisis line to call and there is always 911, though i really dont want to do that. I can also go to the ER at my hospital. But I think its more traumatic that way. I understand what you mean about hte traumatic part of feeling suicidal and how it can get twisted. That can get really scary.
Thanks agian for writing its nice to know that there is someone else out there.
Sienna
> If you feel you can't trust yourself not to try and kill yourself I would go to the hospital. I just know when I was really bad the part of me that wanted to die got too much control. When that happens, it doesn't matter how logically you argue with yourself not to do anything b/c the part of you that wants to die can twist it all around and use it as evidence that you should. I would suggest going right away when you feel out of control, b/c tormenting yourself over whether to do something or not to do something is traumatic in and of itself. Suicide attempts are harmful and should be prevented, beyond the fact that you might actually manage to kill yourself. I hope you are seeing a therapist. Usually therapists give you a number to call if you have a crisis. (Otherwise, you need to see a therapist and need to ask for a number to call if you happen to have a crisis--it's standard policy for them to give you a number.) It varies to whom the number connects you to. It is a good lifeline to have in case you need to talk to someone right away.
poster:sienna
thread:1169
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20020829/msgs/1174.html