Posted by Mark H. on July 26, 2002, at 20:28:38
In reply to Victimization, posted by EmilyAnn on July 26, 2002, at 13:48:36
Emily Ann,
When I'm depressed, I don't always understand what people have said, and instead of mulling over the implications of seemingly insensitive or contradictory statements, I try to remember to ask for clarification.
For instance, when you see your therapist again, you might say something like this:
"The last time we met, I understood you to say that I might be 'using my depression to get something.' Can you tell me why you made that statement and what you meant by it? I've been concerned that you might be blaming me for my illness. Is my concern justified?"
If she responds to your question with another question (a common and parrot-like technique that requires little thought and no insight on the part of the therapist), then you must persist. Remember that if anyone (including your therapist) asks you a question with which you are uncomfortable, it is always appropriate to respond with "Why do you ask?"
Overworked, tired and/or cynical mental health workers sometimes say things out of frustration and exhaustion that they don't really mean. Leave room for your therapist to retract the implication that she is blaming you for having a chronic illness, and then attempt to reestablish the relationship on better footing.
I realize this is a lot to ask of someone who is clinically depressed; however, as depressed as you are, some part of you must also strive to protect your interests as a patient and health care consumer. You certainly have my permission to print this out and hand it to your therapist if you think it would help.
With kind regards,
Mark H.
poster:Mark H.
thread:739
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20020702/msgs/745.html