Posted by wendy b. on June 8, 2002, at 9:22:47
In reply to p.s. » wendy b., posted by beardedlady on June 8, 2002, at 7:04:33
> > You think keeping your healthcare providers afraid to say things is GOOD? I say not. Respectfully, of course, don't want my head chewed off.
>
> Do I seem like the type to you that would keep around doctors I could bully? In order to be my doctor--or even my friend--YOU have to be able to tell ME what to do sometimes. And you have to be committed to your educated opinions. Otherwise, how can I respect you?
>
> Your friend,
>
> beardy
Dear Beardy,As I said before, I mean this is as helpful a way as I can express, perhaps I'm not doing a great job... I don't know if you would keep drs around who you could bully, but if you did, I think it would be unconscious, and that, I suppose, is what I meant in the other post. People do all sorts of things for less-than-logical or intelligent reasons, most of the time without their knowing it. Of course, the poet in you knows this, I'm not telling you anything new. But anyway, that's what the unconscious is all about -- makes us do things we didn't know we wanted to do... But I'll leave you and your therapist to all that...
As you talk about perimenopause, I wanted to tell you it was my OB/GYN who prescribed me Zoloft, my first anti-depressant, when I was about 35 or so (I'm 42 now). It was for some bad perimenopausal symptoms, like screaming and being angry and irritable for 3 weeks out of 4, every month. My daughter suffered through this, and I felt awful enough about it to try something. And though my levels weren't "off," the doctor still felt these symptoms merited a trial. I knew after about a week on the stuff (not a placebo, IMO) that I had been depressed since childhood. But it was only after feeling better that I could make the distinction, if you know what I mean. The contrast was so marked. It finally stopped feeling like around every corner there was some fresh new disaster just waiting to happen to me. It took me a trial of Zoloft to be able to understand that was how I had felt all my life.
Now I know, you are not me. You are thanking your lucky stars, I know. Since the Zoloft, I've been dx'd with Bipolar I, single incident, and then modified to Bipolar II, and I'm on different meds altogether. It took a near manic episode for the therapist/pdoc to figure it out. I think people like me know we have to be on meds, and there is no luxury of questioning: do I or don't I? We just have to, or we'd be gone to another plane. Personally, I would have gotten hypothermia and then drowned in Lake Michigan last winter...
Happy thoughts!
"And now for my next act..."
Wendy
poster:wendy b.
thread:232
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20020516/msgs/251.html