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Re: First Dog

Posted by alexandra_k on February 3, 2020, at 11:44:25

In reply to Re: First Dog alexandra_k, posted by sigismund on January 30, 2020, at 2:12:40

> >they will not fund hope

> But they each and every one of them tell us that they are so optimistic about the future.

> This may not be a contradiction.

I remember a psychotherapist I had once who was of the attitude that 'if I cannot help you, then nobody can'.

There were different prongs to that. Mostly, it amounted to her being defensive about her capacity / ability to help. If she could not help me then the problem must lie with me. Must be my fault.

She became invested (psychologically) in how other clinicians should all know that I could not be helped by them. They would not help me. They would not help me.

She did this by way of choosing what she wrote in my file, you see. Managing the impression that other clinicians would have of me. Recommending (ordering?) that nobody work with me, because I could not be helped.

She was young, to be fair.

She was paid to help. She was paid as a member of the helping profession. To be honest.


Because I did not look after her properly:

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww you are the best psychologist I have ever seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. But I like yoooooooooooou so verrrrrrrrrrry much. Awwwwwwwwwwwww.

Goochie goochie goo. All about you, person paid to help me. Helping you helping you helping you...


They have invested in things being hopeless.

You hear them 'when I came out of university (or when I completed high school or primary school or whatever the case may be) I was so naieve and thought I could save the world and fix everything!'

But then I...

Made so much money doing nothing. Helping nobody. Cr*pp*ng on about crap and going a little bit vacant eyed and garbage output and 'awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww I want nothing more than to help yoooooooooooooooooooooou Dear Person I am paid to help only because I take all your resources for myself awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww all about yooooooooooooooooooooooou Dear Person. All about helping myself to helping myself to helping myself to yooooooooooooooou'.

They have invested in taking the resources that others would / could use to maintain their health and thereby retaining their position as 'health leader'.

I discovered that 1 month after I submitted a thesis for examination that took the Government (Ministry of Health) to task for the underdeveloped crap they spouted about 'equity'... They updated their webpage considerably with respect to what they had to say about equity.

I discovered that 1 year and 1 month after I submitted a thesis for examination that took the Government (Ministry of Health) to task for the underdeveloped ignorance they displayed about the sustainable development goals and about wellbeing and about empowerment of individual people (no matter what race they are)... They had a conference. A government funded conference which was (by the looks of it) by invitation only.

So they take my stuff / respond to my ideas... While refusing to acknowledge the work that I have done. While refusing to process my application for scholarship (academic merit based scholarship that they gave to students with lower GPA than me). While refusing to deliver the only outcome of examination that is based in the reports of examiners (in 1 instance external to this awful country).

I submitted a thesis for examination September of 2018 and still they refuse to credit me for it. The University has set about spamming a succession of unofficial transcripts for me (uploading these to a NZ qualifications website for 'document sharing with employers') that allege to supersceed any past transcripts...

They took my money for the Degree - because they had to. Because they are a Public University so they do not get to pick and choose which students they think are most ineffectual and incompetent to invest in those. They are forced to take the qualified students who apply to them.

And the attitude seems to be 'awwwwwwwwwwww poooooor them, they didn't waaaaant you there. Awwwwww and you inflicted yourself on them anyway. Awwwww poor them . THey are perfectly entitled to refuse to process your scholarship / funding applications according to their merits (just throw away the applications for applying to a topic that the University / the Government will not allow just anyone to say anything about).

There isn't freedom of speech in New Zealand.

Not in the Universities.

Especially not in the Universities.

Universities are not places where people engage in intelligent debate. The level of the debate is 'chocolate is the best flavor and my leadership will ensure that everyone enjoys it on my watch!'

I am trying to think wehre the money comes from.


As we hold out our children (personal hot water bottles) as hostages.

International monetary funding organisations... That give us money otherwise our Government would not provide the most basic of services (they barely do as it is) of clean drinking water and the like...


Dairy farming.
Sheep farming.
(Out farming practices are about maximum volume for minimum quality we can get away with. Our milk appears to be being dehydrated and reconstituted with something... Maybe... Cow snot? It smells like it... For increased protein content. Of course. You know, when we aren't adding things like... I don't remember what to it. Trying to murder the One Child that the people had in China...

So... Government handouts and exploitative business / exploitative business models / practices.

There's our private sector.

Wanna trade with us? Wanna do business?

You give us all your stuff. Cars and phones and computers and medications...

And we'll give you...


See this? We maybe won't kill it.


Wanna do business???


There is something monkey in a suit about the whole Government conference thing. Often it's because it was written by teams of people. You give the document to someone and they line by line rewrite it. Then the next person. ANd they do that. And it goes around. Eventually it is indistinguishable from something that comes out of the postmodernist essay generator.

That's why they show youtube videos of them talking at conferences. Because it masks / disguises the meaning blindness by way of something sort of magician-like of getting people to focus somewhere else.

Instead of the content of what they are saying... There is a meaning-blindness. There isn't much meaning in what they are saying. They don't understand themselves.

But big eyes and hand gestures and pretty dress and nobody is listening to the content. Goochie goochie goo this is conference for New Zealand we are an oral peoples and it would be culturally inappropriate to have coherent written content in our government funded conference where we display to the world all our highest paid government workers and what it is that they do and where it is that all the money goes.

All the money goes to these people. To do what it is that they do. Which is taking the money. For themselves. They have jobs as our highest paid government workers. Our health workforce. To take the money of the people to ensure that the peple remain unhealthy. To ensure the people don't have access to birth control to grow their business. To keep it at the level of 'but we don't have clean drinking water we cannot have cancer care!' always.


Helping them help themselves to the people they are paid to help.


The meaning blindness...

The incomprehension...

The committal. To this being the way things are. They are just doing what htey needed to do to be on top rather than on the bottom. Life is a game (inevitably because of how they chose to live it) whereby you f*ck others or are be f*ck*d by others and you join them in f*ck*ng others or they will f*ck you.

Take your stuff. Blame you for the fact they took it.

Pat themselves on the back for a job well done.

This is the world that they made.

But of course good people will not do business with them.

But of course there need to be an exit strategy for good people.

There needs to be.

Because of what it is that is developed in pockets around the world.

But, uh, never here.

Seems to me.


I think people have been standing down.

I think people have been asked politely.

But then often those people... Nobody asked them to step up. And they werent' competent to lead. And from their perspective if they weren't leading then someone else would... From their perspecitive if they are bossing people around and taking their stuff then someone else would be. So the people cannot be left to manage themselves. There must always be a few managers here and there taking more than their share for themselves and controlling others in that way by withholidng the most basic of resources from them...

Unless / until they hand over their stuff.

They think that they can starve an artist into producing a work of art for them.

They think they can get people working in prositution (or giving it away for free) by refusing them housing.

The human animal is abhorrent to me.




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