Posted by ElaineM on October 26, 2006, at 13:51:22
In reply to Have we been brainwashed by the media?, posted by Deneb on October 25, 2006, at 20:46:53
>>>>>Why am I not satisfied with my normal weight? Do I care only about looks?
I don't think so... I hardly ever wear make-up and I dress like a slob.D*, my friend, you have some of that answer already. Think of your question without the "with my normal weight" part. That's what I hear being the real question. You've mentioned wanting accomplishments, perhaps you feel so stuck that you're looking for anything to help you fill that gap. Perhaps unconsciously, or consciously, weight seems to be the least mentally threatening thing for you to work on? Do you think that's at all true, or no? [you *can* say No you know, right? I don't want to tell you what you think, just see if any of my own thoughts shed a different light] Does every other thing in your world seem uncontrollable or uneffectable (nice word huh!).
But sometimes looks are the easiest thing to care about too. Speaking from my cr@p, it'd be a hell of alot safer-feeling to be worrying that I'm not a size X, than being stuck with the stuff I *am* worrying about. It doesn't seem as scary to me to ruminate on knowing all my calories like the back of my hand, than it is to get stuck on "I'm so lonely I could turn inside-out any moment", or "I'm so far behind in life next to others my age" or "My parents think I'm an incompetent unworthy embarassing daughter" or "I'm afraid of the meds I have to take" or "Will I only keep on getting worse and never improve?" or "What about my teeth!?" or "Will I ever dance again?" ....I could go on and on and on.
If you had to throw in your own there, what do you think you would add?>>>>>Why do I think that I will finally be happy when I'm 95 lbs?
I wonder if deep down (underneath the adding of the weight requirement) you think that you just want to be anything other than everything you are right now - and then *that* would equal happy. I guess I just wonder that cause you said you don't really care about other aesthetic things.
>>>>>Hmmmm.... Brainwashed.
In terms of body image issues, I think you're right - media standards of acceptable body sizes are skewed. It's good that you've noticed that those poor emaciated ones in mags and on TV (I could name one sad little one who appears everywhere these days) are not something people should aspire to - that you'd need to almost be coerced or something to find that desirable. Some people don't realize that that's *not* natural, so you're ahead of them there. Keep working in that direction - you know what's going on. I think that's a really great start to understanding more. Let me know if you come upon any other realizations that help figure stuff out a bit more. It's always interesting listening to what others have found out about themselves. [I think it helps be understand myself a little more too ;-) ]
blove, ELps. Have you ever read "The Beauty Myth" by Naomi Wolf? It's amazing.
poster:ElaineM
thread:697767
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/eating/20060628/msgs/697936.html