Posted by ElaineM on July 18, 2006, at 9:34:41
In reply to need a hug, posted by Emily Elizabeth on July 18, 2006, at 8:27:40
EE: What is it with parents sometimes?! It is so hard committing to therapy or medication, and then dealing with any side-effects, without having to defend yourself.
Is your mom super-health conscious herself. Every time my mother calls my sister a name (to do with her weight) I just have to shake my head in disbelief. It's not like my mother is slim herself, or goreously beautiful, or really atheletic. She still will throw out the weight comments (back-handed, or right in your face) even after I've spent years in the hospital. I guess that's when you can really see that comments like that aren't truly about your weight, or appearance at all. And I don't think it matters to parents how old you are. My sis and I are in our 20's too.
And it's strange, I doubt someone would say that stuff to a neighbour, or stanger, but family seems to be alright?!I wonder if it's similar for you. I bet there's other things going on in your mom's head. Especially if your T has noted her behaviour. It must've been pretty hard dealing with that, and avoiding "full-blown" disorders.
Did you feel okay with yourself before you went to see her? Not perfect, but okay? If you put on one of the outfits you wore before you went (or your fav. one), can you get any comfort from the fact that it fits the same.
I know semi-stranger hugs are not the same thing but, ((((EE)))). It's tough. I think it's more about getting some time between yourself and the comment. If there's not a constant flow, they tend to fade -- even if it's just a bit.
EL
poster:ElaineM
thread:667960
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/eating/20060628/msgs/667965.html