Posted by Lebowski on December 23, 2003, at 14:03:57
Does anyone out there have Type I Bipolar Disorder? If so, have you had a history of addictive type activities such as alcohol, drugs, etc.
I was diagnosed in July of this year with type I and I have really been struggling with a lot of things in my life since I found out about it. All my life I have been "different" not very social, always negative and down on myself, but then there were times I would be fine and full of energy and very outgoing. I had no idea what was going on. As I got older I began to drink more and more alcohol to the point where I was having blackouts in junior high school. When I got to college, I graduated into pot, then shrooms, acid, hash, mesclin, and about 4 years ago coke. It got worse and worse and worse until I hit rock bottom. I almost lost my job, my life, and now my family. I would like to think that this behavior is not my fault, but in reality it is and I know it. yes I have some illnesses, but they can be managed, it's just that I feel out of control sometimes and I do things that I know are wrong anyway.
I am currently taking 900 mg of lithium and 300 mg of Welbutrin SR per day. I have only had one manic episode since I started, but now I seem to be really depressed, but I think it's because the realization of what I've done has set in. I am going to AA meetings and putting all of my energy into showing my wife that I want to change and that I want to save our marriage. She is leaving anyway, but she doesn't know if she wants to get a divorce or not. I guess time will tell.
In any case, I just wanted to know if anyone out there has had or knows someone who has had a similar experience.
Thanks-
poster:Lebowski
thread:292839
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/alter/20031218/msgs/292839.html