Posted by Dr. Bob on July 7, 2009, at 18:03:47
In reply to Re: trust..great post! » twinleaf, posted by fayeroe on July 6, 2009, at 18:33:39
> Everyone ... is very clear that they are NOT confusing past hurts in their lives with hurts which have occurred here on this site. They are so definitive and self-aware about this that it is really rather insulting and patronizing of you to keep telling posters here that you feel you know better than they do what their hidden or unconscious motives for feeling hurt might be.
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that anyone was confused or knew less than me. But even people who are really self-aware can be unaware of their unconscious motives.
> We would like you to understand that the large number of posters who have left have done so because this site, which they valued and trusted a lot, has hurt them. To be specific, your severe blocking policies have hurt them. In my six years posting here, it has been my experience that it is very rare for one poster to hurt another badly. Usually, things are worked out, or, quite often, posters who do not get anything positive out of posting to one another just avoid doing it. A large majority of the interactions here are tremendously caring, understanding and helpful. So, everyone is mostly solving the interpersonal problems which arise by themselves. Punitive actions are just not needed, although I think administrative help in making sure people do solve these situations can occasionally be very valuable.
I'm glad you've found it generally caring, understanding, and helpful here and have only rarely, if ever, been hurt badly by another poster.
I guess others may have left because of my policies or because they didn't get enough positive out of being here.
What sort of administrative help do you all think might be valuable?
> You have put yourself in the position of being like the Gorgon in the Greek myths, who ate his own children.
Please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
But please don't take this personally, either, this doesn't mean I don't like you or think you're a bad person, and I'm sorry if this hurts you.
More information about posting policies and tips on alternative ways to express oneself are in the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#enforceFollow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should of course themselves be civil.
> > it's probably way overdue for me to stop talking about this.
>
> I probably shouldn't talk about what Bob says either.
>
> fayeroeI'm heartened that you're reflecting on how you use your power to post -- and that fayeroe is encouraging you to stop doing something that caused an infraction. Thanks,
Bob
poster:Dr. Bob
thread:904398
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20090707/msgs/905524.html