Posted by fayeroe on June 17, 2009, at 13:26:40
In reply to Re: Rules - What constitutes an infraction?, posted by twinleaf on June 16, 2009, at 22:52:13
> As you know, I prefer the term "guidelines" because of the implied flexibility, but it does mean pretty much the same as "rules"
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> The example you gave would come under a general guideline of failing to treat others with respect. If you felt hurt by this comment, you could say so, and ask the person who said it to make amends so that you no longer felt hurt. This might take several tries back and forth, as well as maybe some cooling-off time. The deputies could just observe while this gets worked out. I know there would be some instances when the deputies would need to take a more active role, but having them jumping in all the time to tell us when we are "wrong" and what we should do to make things "right" can be quite a put-down in and of itself. If the deputies do get involved, I would like to see them help the posters work out their differences, not by telling them what to do, or by administerings PCBs or blocks, but by giving friendly reminders of the importance (necessity) of working things out.
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> If we leave the posters at the center of conflict resolution, each one will, hopefully, eventually get what they need from the other. If the administrators take over, we will get odd situations, like the ones in some of the older threads here, where Bob asks poster #1 to apologize to poster #2. The first poster does so, but the second poster says that he does not feel hurt and that no apology is or was necessary. Errors like this illustrate that the posters themselves know what is needed in a given situation better than the administrators possibly can.Don't forget Bob was pressing posters to get another poster to apologize to other posters. That appears to have gone over like a lead balloon. The posters who were in the thread were uncomfortable with his idea.
I certainly would never, ever tell another poster that "you need to apologize" to blank.....
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poster:fayeroe
thread:901329
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20090529/msgs/901544.html