Posted by Dr. Bob on December 30, 2008, at 2:08:48
In reply to Re: you're un-pbced, happy holidays » lucie lu, posted by BayLeaf on December 26, 2008, at 7:53:09
> I did my best. If my best isn't good enough, I will be happy to step down at Dr. Bob's request.
>
> I don't do this to be a deputy. I do this to be a Babbler. And if you think it feels bad on your "side", it doesn't feel so good over here either.
>
> From my point of view, I didn't draw or want any lines and I don't want any sides. I'd like us to work together to keep Babble a positive environment for posters and posters who happen to be deputies.
>
> Dinah> Historically, when Dr. Bob started the 'deps' ... What they THOT they were going to do, was help out a *little* at babble.....this sadly/unfortunately was not the case. Dr. Bob then proceeded to disappear on them :-( They got a whole LOT, like a whole whole lot more than they bargained for.
> What the deps have to deal with is trying to understand Dr. Bobs ofttimes mysterious rules.
> So the deps started out as babblers that had been here awhile, and they still ARE babblers IMHO, they just are HELPING OUT. They are not paid, they have lives of their own.
>
> This place has changed so much. the rules etc keep changing. I think Dr. Bob is trying to figger what works.
> In the process of him stepping back from babble, he indicated that he wanted ALL babblers to take an interest in the running of this site. Thats partly why the notify button came into play.
> I beleive Dr. Bob would wish us all to help, not just pile all the work/responsibility on the deps. This is NOT what they signed up for.
> So when we see a poster getting upset and feel we can help, then great, help out! ... I think if we all pitch in where we can, it'll make this a better place
>
> Muffled> I'm sorry Dinah, but I feel that if one of us is a deputy, there are going to be up and down days. I realize that you feel put upon and I expect you will again. It is a life thing.
>
> PatDinah, I consider your best to be better than good enough, and I request not that you step down, but that you stay.
I'm also concerned about lines being drawn between posters with and without deputy roles. Both have ups and downs, sometimes feel bad or put upon, want Babble to be supportive, can and do help Babble to be supportive, sometimes get more than they bargained for, and feel mystified by me. That's my impression, at least.
I'm definitely still trying to figger what works. One challenge is that this place keeps evolving. The community evolves, and our roles -- my role, the role of deputies, and the role of posters -- all evolve. And change is hard. But can lead to growth and development, too.
I do think I may have made it harder for the deputies -- which I regret -- by hoping that they would manage the boards like I did. Maybe that made sense when we started. But with the growth and development since, and with me stepping back, it may be time for me to try to empower them to be more autonomous. And at the same time to support them by backing them up.
--
> I used to post a lot, but got my precious feelings hurt too much. You know, primary feelings, secondary feelings. Hurt...anger.
> It was unfair to dump Babble on them, and takes advantage of their emotional attachment to Babble and Babblers, and perhaps Bob.
>
> By allowing him to do this - they are enabling him to continue the age old "cycle of abuse".
>
> Bay (guessing she'll see you next year!)I'm afraid incivility, and the accompanying administrative action, can also continue cycles of hurt. Please don't take this personally, it doesn't mean I don't like you or think you're a bad person. But I need to ask you not to post anything that could lead others to feel accused (for example, of taking advantage or enabling others).
More information about posting policies and tips on alternative ways to express oneself are in the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#enforceFollow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above posts, should of course themselves be civil.
Thanks,
Bob
poster:Dr. Bob
thread:870417
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20081228/msgs/871380.html