Posted by muffled on November 20, 2008, at 16:14:51
In reply to Open letter to (or rather ABOUT) 'dr. bob', posted by Amigan on November 19, 2008, at 15:17:49
> I believe that i have waited long enough for him to reply to my mail and i think it's time for me to do my last post in this place.
*well. If you are not comfortable here, then it is best to move on. There are many boards out there, hopefully you will find one to fit your needs.
I don't post here much anymore either. Though I miss the wonderful people here.
> Once upon a time, psycho-babble was a great board to participate in and i thought that i had found a new home.
> From a certain point and on, i realised that most people started to ignore my posts.. (Apart from the usual person who replies to every thread. You know...) At the beginning, i tried to convince myself that everything was fine, that it was something coincidental and that it was just me... But the thing kept going and going at a degree that there was absolutely no point in opening a thread, (even if i was on an emergency) as i KNEW in advance that my question will have the same luck as my previous ones.*I am sorry, I am bad at remembering and I am sorry if I ever ignored your posts. I post primarily on psychology, and only now and then. So I don't know if I have encountered you or not. I agree with Dinah, that on that board, usus someone will reply, even if there is a delay.
> What REALLY puzzles me, (and what made me post this message instead of just fleeing and forget about this issue) is that i always tried to behave according the written and unwritten rules of internet's savoir-vivre:
> I wasn't flooding the board with everyday questions.
> I was always trying to reply to other's people questions when i've had something useful to say. (My knowledge is limited)
> I was trying not to troll, harrass and generally, do nothing that would justify what i.. was observing!*well that all sounds GOOD! I wish I could help you more, but like I say I am not familiar with how you post. I just wanted to reply to this post cuz I admired that you are trying to sort this problem out.
I think Dinah had some great suggestions.
> So.. i decided to send a PM to teh doctor, seeking for a REASONABLE answer to this unexplained phenomenon which i was observing with my own eyes...
> And here is my firsts message to him:
> " Hello Doctor.
> May i ask you something regarding me and psycho-babble? But i'm expecting a sincere answer from you.
> Amigan."
>
> (A note to anyone who's reading this: Emphasize on the word "SINCERE" for future reference)
>
>
> He replied via an email, not PM, saying:
> "Sure, what's your question?
>
> Bob"
*well FWIW it is NOT JUST you who does not get replies from Bob. In the past I have emailed him and sometimes he answers, sometimes not, sometimes I get an email LONG after my email and have to go back and find my old email to even see WTF Bob even talking about!
My understanding of Bob, is that he is very busy, and Babble is not his 'baby' anymore, and so his care for this site is not high on his list of priorities.
> I replied his mail by saying the following:
> "Well, i have noticed lately that most of my have been provocatively and
> repeatedly ignored by most, if not all, of the psycho-babble members,
> in a degree that i feel it is pointless to participate any longer. I have
> created a thread about this situation on the administrator board.
> You might say that this is a global phenomenon that has to do with the
> crisis which the forum has entered lately and that it affects all members,
> but i see that this lack of participation is mainly aimed on... ME, while> posts of other members ALWAYS take more attention than mine even if their
> content is ehm.. silly/ been answered a thousand times or even if the poster
> in question is a casual flooder/offender.*Just FYI, as you have asked why people are not responding to you. This last two statements of yours might give a small clue, I don't know...
You state that the content of others posts might be 'silly'. I have NEVER EVER seen a post that I would say was 'silly', as long as its honest.
and you stated, 'even if the poster is an occasional flooder', when you state this, along with the 'silly' statement, you are placing a "judgement" on others peoples posts. I think maybe the key may be having acceptance of ALL posting styles ourselves. Cuz as you said, this IS a mental health board. So it may be varying.
I just wanted to point this out to you, NOT to 'judge' you in ANY way. But in order to help you try and sort out why you might be getting the response(or lack of) that you have been feeling.
I may be WAAAY off base(wouldn't be the first time!), but just offering my thots to you as I am genuinely admiring of you trying to sort out your problem :-)
(again, it may be interesting to try and persue this on psychology).
> I HATE to be ignored and, believe me, i have left from many forums because
> of this reason. (I do know that i sound like an attention-drawer right now,
> but i'm so NOT)
> I don't think that i am delusional. It is something that happens for real.
> I can SEE that it happens and i REALLY like to know why it happens because
> i'm sick of leaving forums because of this.
>
> So... what i would like to ask you is this:
> I have many cyber-enemies.. Some of them may or may not be spreading false-
> rumours over the internet about me. Have any of them contacted you or any of
> your deputies and spilled their lying poison regarding myself? I do know that
> i'm getting a bit paranoid or over-suspicious in this point, BUT i have
> absolutely no alternative explanation of what i observe.
> Don't take this message as a complain about you and your forum, please,
> because it is not! All i want is an answer.
>
> Thank you in advance for your sincerity.
> Amigan."
>
>
>
> Now, exactly 1 month later, i haven't got a reply from him and i'm not going to, obviously.
> I guess he isn't... SINCERE enough to reply...
> But, ven if he thought that i am a delusional nut-case, do you think that this would justify his unwillingness to reply to me? He IS a psychiatrist you know... He deals with this type of people everyday.*ROFL!!! Sorry, but thats proly the EXACT reason you didn't get a reply, cuz Bob IS a PSYCHIATRIST......not to generalize but......anyhow...p-docs like to ASK questions, not answer them! ;-)
and then Bob is just Bob. I do not undertsand him. I struggled to. UNSUCCESSFULLY.
So the point I am trying to make here, is for you NOT to take anything(or lack of response) from Bob personally. He is treating you no differently than he treats(or ignores) anyone else here.
Plus he just is not around babble much anymore, so he probably doesn't have a clue ANYways.
>
> ** TO CUT THE LONG STORY SORT **
> Anyway, on what made me bother to make this post.. Well, i am determined to find out what's going on. In fact i have the RIGHT to know what's going on. Therefore i would be obligated to anyone who has any information to give me about this, if he/she steals 5 minutes of his/her time to send me an email to: des_pina@freemail.gr
> You don't have to say who you are of course! Use your spare e-mail address or whatever. I absolutely RESPECT your anonymity and anything you say will remain between you and me.
>
> Thank you. By "you", i mean to anyone who will decide to contact me. I have no reason to thank anyone else in this.. ehm... place.
>
> bye.
>*Well, I know nothing. But I do not do much B-mailing for the very reason that it can become gossipy and problematic. I figger if I got something to say, I should be able to say it in front of all.
I hope you can find a place to feel connected and safe.
Try not to worry bout what other people think, or what you think they may be thinking. I get caught up in that from time to time, but not so much now. Used to though.
If you would like to try and continue posting on Babble, my suggestion would be the psychology board.
Try and start a thread bout how you feel, that you would like suggestions on posting styles etc.
I think you may find you are not alone in your feelings, and that with some time and perseverance, it may be OK.
Just my recommendation is to keep it all on the boards. Avoid PM and B-mail except for ocassional.
I really liked this post and how you explained what was happening for you.
Keep trying.
Sincerely,
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:864026
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20081003/msgs/864256.html