Posted by Dr. Bob on October 29, 2006, at 18:16:25
In reply to Re: Please be civilDinah, posted by willyee on October 29, 2006, at 14:50:01
> Is being honest the same as being uncivil? I don't understand. I have freedom of speech. Am I being silenced?
>
> GirlnterruptedThanks for trying to understand. As Dinah said, your freedom of speech is limited here. Being honest isn't the same as being uncivil, but it's possible for being honest to be uncivil. It depends on what you have to say.
--
> > Please be sensitive to their feelings even if yours are hurt.
>
> This comment greatly confuses me,i ask if it can be explained more.
>
> willyeeI'm glad you asked, too. The idea is that I'd like people here not to retaliate when they feel hurt. Wanting to do so is perfectly understandable, but actually doing so I think makes it less supportive here. It's kind of a cliché, but two wrongs don't make a right. That doesn't, however, mean people can't say they feel hurt, that kind of honesty is fine. Using "I-statements" can help a lot:
http://www.crnhq.org/windskill4.html
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20040112/msgs/320097.htmlI know it can take some time to get the hang of it, but it's not a bad skill to develop.
Bob
poster:Dr. Bob
thread:698749
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20061018/msgs/698815.html