Posted by krazy kat on July 10, 2002, at 13:10:19
First off, I am doing this for the same reason I have posted my feelings and concerns here all along - a selfish reason. If I didn't care about the board and how it relates to Me, I would not have argued for certain things on the admin board as I have. So I am selfish. And my leaving is selfish. And I'm hoping that this final, final, final word, will give me the strength not to check in here except perhaps on the med board which is still very useful and on which I could still be useful.
These are just a few brief, civil responses to Shar's post to Judy on 2000. I really don't want to offend Judy, because she has always seemed to be a kind and wonderful person on this board. And I am sorry this upheaval has upset her. I believe most of the "upheavelers" are gone, :), though more will surely come down the road.
Please keep in mind I was around before it took on this "tone" and I imagine there is a certain hour, a certain word that caused it to shift. I remember the wonderful and sometimes life-saving interchanges with people on social. There wasn't an air of fearing to post because your intention would be determined ahead of time or fear of posters bombasting Dr. Bob, which is I "think" what has upset Judy, and rightly so.
But to say something such as "I guess if someone isn't interested in supporting the people who are in pain, or their interest is superceded by political considerations, so be it" (Shar)
exmeplifies why I feel I must leave. I am interested in supportings others in pain and have done so on this site the whole time I've been here. But when one keeps hitting a brick wall with support, when the ability to communicate easily with those suffering is taken away, it becomes not only destructive for the "supportees" but also for the "supporters". Over the last few months, I have had my intentions questioned and my wording criticized more than the first year-and-a-half here, and I guess it wore me down.
"If posters leave because they don't think someone (or 20 someones) should have been blocked, obviously their commitment is not to the people who remain (you and me, and all the others)." (shar) - there's much more to it, than that. Most of us have left emails where we can be reached if someone needs help or to stay in touch, so this is not necessarily true.
Dr. Bob has clearly stated here that he is more concerned about the "supportees" than the "supporters", and of course we change roles constantly. But there cannot be a site without supporters. Admin is a place for both to express their concerns and help get them resolved. It's just that nothing's been getting resolved lately.
"They'll undoubtedly be missed by some, but if PSB gets back to the business of support etc., I think the grieving process will be short" (Shar) - wow. ouch.
"I am ready for the Psycho Babble power struggle to come to an end" (Shar) - it's not really a power-struggle. We all know Dr. Bob calls the shots. But without a place to express our concerns re: the running of the board, well... there's an option for Dr. Bob and those who feel compelled to stay. Get rid of the admin board. I feel certain you will lose many more people that way out of frustration, but Dr. Bob Could just accept e-mails instead. And of course, there is lost information for Dr. Bob re: the communication between posters without admin... but it's an option.
I meant to address other specifics so as not to target that one post, or poster, but this is getting far too long.
Dr. Bob's site is a good site. It has problems, though, which I'm guessing are mostly due to growth and an inability to handle it individually.
I certainly wish I had not blown my top that night, and ruined an almost perfect posting record of no swears. I also wish I had not returned out of curiosity and read Shar's post. Those arrows sure hit the mark.
It's mostly your board, old timers, and some new folks whom I hope will stick around. But it's not going to be the same as it was when it started, I feel certain of that. I have returned after saying I was leaving before because one Is drawn back here because it has a great cast of intelligent, caring people. But I have recognized that it has caused myself and my family more harm than good for many months and so I selfishly depart.
Good luck.
- KK
poster:krazy kat
thread:6155
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020627/msgs/6155.html